I cleaned the living room yesterday.
That shouldn’t be such a huge thing, but to me, it is. Executive function is one of the things I struggle with on a daily basis, and it’s really not one of my strong points. (That shouldn’t be a shock to anyone who’s reading this blog, since executive function issues are a HUGE part of ADHD) And of course, cleaning is one of those things governed by executive function – specifically, task initiation. My brain is always “well, we know we need to clean the house, but knitting/playing video games/reading a book is giving us that dopamine high we need so much because we enjoy this more than cleaning, so eh, let’s put it off.”
And so I let things slide until the carpet is covered in cat hair and little bits of cat litter (stupid stuff gets tracked all over the place, I swear), or until there’s piles of stuff covering every flat surface in my craft room, or until hubby’s saying “could you please put the towels away tonight, they’ve been sitting in the hall unfolded for four days now”. Then I look around at the mess and feel miserable, because I’m nearly 37 years old and can’t keep the house clean regularly and it’s embarrassing.
I try to split things up into smaller tasks, telling myself I’ll neaten up the living room on Monday, clean up the kitchen table on Tuesday, and so on – and that works for a little while. Then I get distracted, or have a rough day at work and just flop on the couch and play Stardew Valley until my phone’s battery dies, and the chores sit undone.
Maybe I need one of those chore charts, like I had when I was a kid, to help me remember what needs doing and to give me a visual reminder of my progress. Granted, that didn’t work all that well when I was a kid, but then again, I was also dealing with undiagnosed ADHD, which definitely didn’t help things at all. As an adult, though, checking things off and documenting actual progress does help motivate me, so maybe I do need to have someplace where I can mark down my daily chores and indicate that yes, I’ve actually completed them.
Maybe I should start properly bullet journaling again. I dunno. I switched from using a bullet journal to using Todoist to keep track of what I need to do on a daily basis, but it doesn’t give me a great visualization of what specifically I’ve done over the week. Maybe keeping track of my chores on paper might help me more. I dunno.
All I do know is that I cleaned up the living room yesterday, and I’m damn proud of myself for that.